What is School-A-Palooza?
School-A-Palooza is the greatest parent-faculty talk show fundraiser in the known Universe, and also in areas presently unknown. As they say in that beer commercial, it doesn't get any better than this, and that's proven each and every year when PSIS 187 parents and faculty dust off their dance shoes, bust out their instruments, work on their vocal scales and hand massage their comedy chops into shape in order to put on an amazing show for the audience. School-A-Palooza is that, and then some. So there.
Where is School-A-Palooza Performed?
We don't like to limit the presence of School-A-Palooza to our physical universe, often thinking of it more in an eternal, ethereal way. But the earthly answer is at PSIS 187, our amazing school, which according to the post office resides at 349 Cabrini Blvd, New York, NY, 10040.
When does School-A-Palooza happen?
School-A-Palooza used to be in the spring, but then the Producers realized that dancing around on stage in a unitard in June doesn't do anyone any good. So for the last several years, and for the foreseeable future, the show is always the Saturday before Thanksgiving. That way even the turkeys can come and enjoy the show.
How long has School-A-Palooza been around?
Didn't anyone ever teach you that it's not nice to ask a lady her age? Man. Just rude. But now that it's out there, we're gonna say that the first School-A-Palooza show was in the Spring of 2008.
What kind of show is School-A-Palooza?
The kind of show that rocks - and doesn't apologize for it! The common term for this is a "talent show," meaning that various parents and faculty members get up on stage and perform particular talents. But since there's no real quantifiable way to measure talent, we really don't worry about it too much. Just tell your friends the show is awesome and we'll leave it at that.
Who performs in School-A-Palooza?
There are very strict rules for performing in our show. You have to be a parent with a child at the school. Or you have to be a faculty member at the school. Or you have to have some relation to a student at the school. Or you have to have one of the Producers owe you money from a backgammon game gone wrong during a sordid weekend in Philly. If that's you, you're eligible.
How do you raise money for School-A-Palooza?
We take a lump sum of cash, freshly laundered and untraceable, and invest it in really risky collateralized debt obligations that are rated just south of junk bond. Then we wait until the market is highly unstable and eventually dump it at a record low price. When that doesn't work, we canvass local businesses to place advertisements in our Paloozabill, sell t-shirts, charge admission at the box office and sell a ton of food at Food-A-Rama, our culinary pre-show fest.
Do kids get to perform during School-A-Palooza?
No. Being a kid can stink, and this is one of those times. But once they graduate, go to college, get a job, meet someone special, have children and then stick those kids into PSIS 187, THEN they can do the show.
Can I attend School-A-Palooza even if I don't have a child at the school?
Yes, of course. The more the merrier. We are a fundraiser, which means we need to raise those funds, and we're not particular about whose pocket we pick.
What is Food-A-Rama?
Food-A-Rama is the pre-School-A-Palooza chow fest, where we sell lots of super delicious and only slightly nutritious foods such as cupcakes and pizza and burritos and popcorn. The doors for Food-A-Rama typically open 90 minutes before the curtain goes up on the show, so there's plenty of time to stuff your face before your laugh it off.
How can I help with School-A-Palooza?
There are lots of ways to help. You can perform in the show. You can help us sell ads. You can volunteer to watch the boy's bathroom for two hours straight. Just send us an email at firstname.lastname@example.org and we'll figure out some way to put you to work for no pay.
When is the next School-A-Palooza show?
Sooner than you think. Click here to find out!